Knoxville Mercury Cover Story On Fulton and Maryville.

Discussion in 'Sports' started by hatvol96, Aug 27, 2015.

  1. hatvol96

    hatvol96 Well-Known Member

    I only thought I couldn't dislike Maryville more.
     
  2. Tenacious D

    Tenacious D The law is of supreme importance, or no importance

    Card will be along in a moment to tell you how foolish / jealous / hateful you are, how Muhr-Vuhl's success is because George Quarles is Jesus' older brother, and not simply because they are an open-enrollment school who poaches the vast majority of their talent from neighboring schools / counties.

    He'll also tell you that if Fulton beats Muhr-Vuhl by 100-0, that it won't matter.

    Just wait. The Muhr-Vuhl Marauder will set you straight, toot suite.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Aug 27, 2015
  3. hatvol96

    hatvol96 Well-Known Member

    George Quarles is Joel Osteen in a headset. He can go pound sand. His idiocy about them having "more to lose" than Fulton would be comedic if his faux televangelist ass didn't believe it. How does the night go for the kid who loses for Maryville? He cries for the cameras for a few minutes to make good television. He then showers, walks to the new car mom and dad had waiting in the driveway for him when was 16, picks up his brand new Galaxy and calls the future sorostitute he's dating to confirm this is the weekend her parents are in Jackson Hole. He then dials up mom and dad to tell them he's staying at his pal Chip's house. They console him. He tells them it will be fine.
    The Fulton kid? He cries til he nearly dehydrates. He then wears his pieced together uniform on a beaten up school bus headed back to East Knoxville, doesn't bother trying to call his girlfriend because he knows she is working the register at the Kroger on Broadway tonight. He then walks home hoping the 'heads and the 'bangers aren't out tonight. He gets home to a dark house because mom is working graveyard shift and has a small snack because he doesn't want to put mom and his brothers and sisters out. Mom wakes him up when she gets home and tells him she feels bad about the team losing and that there wasn't his favorite version of Chef Boyardee in the house because the late fee on the electric bill ate into the grocery funds. He tells her it will be fine.
     
    Last edited: Aug 27, 2015
  4. hatvol96

    hatvol96 Well-Known Member

    Also, watch George Osteen find a way to not make the return trip to East Knoxville next year.
     
  5. Unimane

    Unimane Kill "The Caucasian"

    I found the comment about spending $10-15,000 a year on equipment upkeep and then saying "I don't know how some schools do it" particularly loathsome. I'll end his suspense. They don't do it. They manage to survive without a shiny new cod piece every year. Seriously, $15,000 every year?
     
  6. hatvol96

    hatvol96 Well-Known Member

    The guy's level of condescension is off the charts. I get enough piety and unwarranted arrogance following and covering sports. I'm definitely not going to take from some suburban East Tennessee high school coach whose teams wouldn't be noticed if they were in Georgia or Texas. Save it for the 'necks at the booster club, Osteen. I ain't buying it.
     
    Last edited: Aug 27, 2015
  7. hatvol96

    hatvol96 Well-Known Member

    The article did make me feel good about the fact I never darken the door of Subway or Chik-fil-A.
     
  8. CardinalVol

    CardinalVol Uncultured, non-diverse mod

  9. Dick Huffman

    Dick Huffman Guest

    "hard times, ric flair!!!!!!"
     
  10. JohnnyQuickkick

    JohnnyQuickkick Calcio correspondent

  11. JohnnyQuickkick

    JohnnyQuickkick Calcio correspondent

    I don't have a dog in the fight but I'll say this, from the times I've been in the Maryville stands, a few of those people deserve to sit through a few 1-9 seasons.
     
  12. hatvol96

    hatvol96 Well-Known Member

    "A few" meaning the rest of their natural lives.
     
  13. zehr27

    zehr27 8th's VIP

    Dang I want to adopt that poor Fulton kid now.
     
  14. Tenacious D

    Tenacious D The law is of supreme importance, or no importance

    Ha! Ha! It's funny cause Muhr-Vuhl is a bunch of cheating hicks with a bunch of pompously delusional fans who have a sense of faux-achievement!
     
  15. utvol0427

    utvol0427 Chieftain

    Chef Boyardee? Kid doesn’t know how lucky he's got it. When I was little, seeing Chef Boyardee in the cabinet was cause for celebration. I usually had to settle for the generic canned pasta.
     
  16. utvol0427

    utvol0427 Chieftain

    Also, Maryville can eat shit.
     
  17. NorrisAlan

    NorrisAlan Founder of the Mike Honcho Fan Club

    South-Young Trojans forever!

    Wait.

    What do you mean my school has been dissolved and merged with another school?

    Damn.
     
  18. JohnnyQuickkick

    JohnnyQuickkick Calcio correspondent

    They built a new high school in south Gibson county and that really changed things back home. Wouldn't have gone to Humboldt if I lived there now. It didn't help Humboldt High School, either
     
  19. Tenacious D

    Tenacious D The law is of supreme importance, or no importance

    [​IMG]
    "What's his 40 time, again?"
     
  20. Tenacious D

    Tenacious D The law is of supreme importance, or no importance

    Look at their season totals prior to becoming open-enrollment. That's essentially what they did.

    But according to Card, the change came when Quarles rode his fiery chariot down from the heavens, on a mission from God, like the Patron Saint of Loopholes, spreading the good news of competing with an open team, against closed team opponents.
     

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