Bad Mojo

Discussion in 'Vols Football' started by cotton, Oct 14, 2011.

  1. cotton

    cotton Stand-up Philosopher

    So, UT is somewhat famously 1-16 or 17 when my wife is in attendance in Neyland. The curse dates to the '00 Jabar Gaffney game and was interrupted only by Dallas Baker's slap fight in '04. She's watched good teams blow out UT, good teams throw last second TDs to beat UT, and mediocre teams send disgruntled fans home with a loss after a puntfest.

    We'll be sitting on the sidelines Saturday, and I fully expect the streak to continue. Two questions:

    1. Is there some goat we should sacrifice, some Billy Penn statue we should raise, or some person or thing we should lay hands upon to exorcise the demons?

    2. How long before we can travel to Knoxville to see a game against a good opponent and see a UT team good enough that we should actually expect a win?
  2. fl0at_

    fl0at_ Humorless, asinine, joyless pr*ck

    I think it is pretty clear. You have to kill Jabar Gaffney.
  3. IP

    IP Super Moderator

    I believe the solution your are seeking is divorce.
  4. cotton

    cotton Stand-up Philosopher

    Not really an option. She's a !$#*ing lawyer.
  5. NYY

    NYY Super Moderator

    From reading prior posts of yours, Cotton, I'd recommend dropping her off at Fox Den Country Club. That way she can win you some money sandbagging the locals.

    You'll need extra money for the bar tab after this ass beating.
  6. Beechervol

    Beechervol Super Moderator

    1-16 is hard to believe.
  7. IP

    IP Super Moderator

    The law of averages tells me to expect a big win.
  8. cotton

    cotton Stand-up Philosopher

    At the risk of leaving something out, let me try to recap:

    2000 Florida
    2001 Georgia
    2002 Florida, Bama
    2003 Georgia
    2004 Florida
    2005 Georgia, South Carolina
    2006 Florida, LSU
    2008 Florida, Bama
    2009 UCLA, Auburn
    2010 Bama
    2011 LSU

    That's 1-15 after LSU, and again, I've probably missed somebody. I attended the home losses against Miami, Oregon, and '04 Auburn, but I don't think she made all of them (although she did get to see Auburn beat us in the '04 SECCG.) '04 Florida is definitely the only win she has seen in Neyland. We were on our way to Knoxville for the '07 Arkansas game, but a family emergency caused us to change plans.

    She has seen a couple of UT wins at Vanderbilt and Kentucky, a win in the Cotton Bowl, a split at the Outback bowl, and a loss in both the SECCG and Music City Bowl.
  9. droski

    droski Traffic Criminal

    i currently have a double digit road game losing record dating back to 1999. i blame cal's suckiness though. i haven't seen a close game since 2007 against ucla and that was game ended with a pick 6 to lose the game. oh joy.
  10. cotton

    cotton Stand-up Philosopher

    The jinx makes for interesting conversation, but mainly I attribute UT's home record when she is in attendance to two factors:

    1. We usually only go to games against good teams;
    2. UT hasn't been all that good during the vast majority of the time we have been together.
  11. Cotton, the answer is clear.

    You must take your wife to Neyland Stadium and sacrifice her to the Football Gods.
  12. JayVols

    JayVols Walleye Catchin' Moderator

    I would say the he should just nail her in both endzones and 50 yd line to undo the jinx.....
  13. IP

    IP Super Moderator

    Just become an Alabama fan this weekend, please.

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