Watching Back to the Future and The Blind Side this morning gave me a brilliant idea. If UT's engineering department could just develop a time machine, we could just travel back and locate elite players when they are mere babies. Think if we kidnapped Herschel Walker, Deion Sanders, and Randy Moss as babies? We'd then place the future superstar infants with pro-UT foster families in 1996 Knoxville. We'd be looking at the best recruiting class of all time and three straight national championships. Dynasties aren't built by thinking inside the box.
You're thinking inside the box. We go back in time and create a breeding program, MAKING the elite athletes and molding their childhoods to make them completely loyal to UT. OR- build a transdimensional portal to recruit multiple copies of the SAME elite players. Imagine if Hurd was backed up by 3 other Hurds? Or an entire defensive backfield and WR corps composed entirely of Berrys? You aren't trying hard enough, kpt. Columbus would have crushed time and flattened it on one side, then played football on it.
I'm surrounded by drones. To truly think outside the box, we scratch the breeding program, and simply modify each player's DNA, like Gattaca, to be the ultimate football player. We then clone that player in a lab, 30 stories underground, which we will call "The Hive," like in that game/movie Resident Evil. Then, we'll remove all independent thought so that there is no way they can ever go anywhere else, but only do exactly as we say, like in that movie Star Wars. Just wild and crazy ideas, here. But the real goal is to build a stadium, with our neighbors Canada and Mexico, after we get signed documents, of course, on the moon! We'll share the keys to the spaceship. Although each country having their own spaceship would probably be good, in case someone loses one, or takes one home.
I was also kicking around the idea of some sort of psychic think tank machine like in Minority Report, except rather than predicting murders they predict football plays from the opposition.
It wouldn't be a bad idea to make the players use 65% of their brain, so that they can move matter, space and time.
What if we release dozens of radioactive spiders in the vistors' locker room? The other team will either turn into Spiderman, and thus have better things to do, or die.
Ninjas, maybe. Or an intergalactic set of aliens that challenges our planet to a game of football to determine who wins Earth.
