Alright boys, so it's time to look back at Week 3... What, you say Week 4 has already begun? That can't be right, unless... yep, Kent State and Buffalo sold out their tradition for the almighty ESPNU dollar and played on Wednesday. Shame on you guys. I remember a time when values meant more than... Hold on, there was a Thursday game too? And it's a commonly accepted scheduling date? OK. You win this time. Bad job outta me. (ed. note - There went Friday) Now, on to the predictions: Red State - losing to little brother... how embarassing Balls Tate 41, Indiana 39 - Three straight for Ball State against Indiana. Ouch. Name of the Week candidate QB Keith #Wenning only needed 52 of 58 available seconds to put the Cardinals in range for the game winning FG. Embarrassing the SEC - Kentucky Auburn 31, Louisiana Monroe 28 (OT) - Hey ULM, remember that one time when you didn't kick the FG in OT and scored a TD to win instead? Guess not. They got the ball first this time, but that doesn't make their kicker adequate. Western Kentucky 32, Kentucky 31 (OT) - This one could go in nearly every category. Go for 2 and the win and dial up a HB pass to the QB? Love it, but I'm not sure how it would end against teams that aren't Kentucky. Slummin' It - losing to 1-AA teams (or 1-A teams that would miss the 1-AA playoffs), or making it interesting Cal Poly SLO 24, Wyoming 22 - Never a good sign when your team loses to what appears to be a random string of syllables. One of which is a homophone of slow. Bobby Zalud (Zaxby's fan?) hit a 51-yarder that proved to be the winning margin. Kicker recruiting is tough. Participation Report - BCS team with a 50 point loss? Well, at least you tried. Florida State 52, Wake Forest 0 - Only 126 total yards for Wake. But their punter went for 520 on 13 punts. Ray Guy nods his approval. Alabama 52, Arkansas 0 - I figure SEC games are a net neutral as far as embarrassment goes, so we'll stick this here. Plus, Arkansas seems to have adopted embarrassing themselves as a state pastime this year. First there was Petrino. Next comes John L. Smith, the stabilizing force who just happens to have filed bankruptcy, allegedly owing $24 million to creditors. That's the safe bet to lead your program for a year? Then you have the Hog Lady. Yes, there is really a Wikipedia article on Pig-faced Women. Yes, there are 70 (70!) references. No, I didn't compile that entire article for the purposes of this blog. Akron 66, Morgan State 6 - This one doesn't technically belong here. At all. I'm highlighting it as a warning to Tennessee. Any team capable of beating any other team by 60 is a threat to Dooley. Period. Name of the Week candidate Tubotein Taylor led Morgan State with 31 yards receiving. Mile High Club - where only the opponents are getting lucky San Jose State 40, Colorado State 20 - Saban's coaching tree appears to be necrotic. Probably has something to do with the prolonged exposure to Harvey Upd(y)ke. Fresno State 69, Colorado 14 - Fresno State totally wined and dined Colorado. 55 points in the first half, pretty sure that you couldn't do worse just kneeling every down. Trophy Watch - Heisman? What's that? Ohio 27, Marshall 24 - Battle of the Bell - There are actually three distinct Division I-A Battles of the Bells. I had no idea that bells were so in demand these days. Myself, I'm the type that if someone is willing to fight to take a bell, I say let them have it. Big crack down the side? All the more reason to just let it go. Toledo 27, Bowling Green 15 - Battle of I-75 Trophy - Sponsored by Taylor Kia. Seriously. Replaced the Peace Pipe trophy which was ceded in order to correct the injustices against Native Americans throughout this country's history. Seems even now IMO. Notre Dame 20, Michigan State 3 - Megaphone Trophy - Rumor has it that there was a big surprise waiting for the Irish at Between the Buns upon their return. UTEP 41, New Mexico State 28 - The Silver Spade and the Brass Spittoon - Hit the link to see Mike Price double-fisting the trophies. Nice to see he's found a more socially-acceptable outlet for his passion. (That is likely the dirtiest joke I've ever told.) Two times the trophies, two times as awesome? Utah 24, BYU 21 - Beehive Boot - Utah fans almost became the exception that proved "all is fair in love and (Holy) War" after a 15 yard penalty for storming the field during a live ball when the game-tying 51 yard FG attempt was blocked. Just moments after storming the field the play before when a booth review reset the clock to one second remaining. Given a second second chance, BYU's kicker missed from 36, proving even less accurate than Utah's fans. See what happens when you let a bunch of Mormons get Coked up pregame? Chaos. Name of the Week - #Wenning
