How Participation Trophies Are Making Kids Soft

I hate losing as much as anybody, but I guess I'll come in and be the dissenting voice here. Focusing too much on winning at a young age can actually be counterproductive to skill development. This is a common critique of the development of soccer players in the US. Because the youth coaches are trying so hard to win, they try to get the players to play within a relatively rigid structure, which in the short term will be more successful than just letting kids try crap, but in the long-term hampers creativity.

I've helped coach a middle school soccer team, and I do 3v3 to try to encourage skill development, particularly dribbling and passing in tight spaces. One player per team will almost always drop back almost all the way to the goal, serving as a makeshift goalie for the little cone goals. When the goals are small enough, it's a pretty effective strategy, but it also totally defeats the purpose and makes it less fun.

I think you see this effect more often in soccer than in other sports, simply because of the nature of the game, but the fact remains that overprioritizing winning can harm more than just self-esteem. Winning has its place, but when you're at the youth level and it's more important than having fun, playing fair, and building skill, you have a problem. Doesn't necessarily mean participation trophies and refusing to keep score are the best solutions, but "everybody's a winner" parenting is definitely not the only problem with youth sports.

 

Legendary. How in the hell does one not get at least one single hit in a f***ing season? I don't care what age or level you are at, that's hard to do. He should have had his American citizenship revoked.

 

How? I can't.......how?

 

I don't think I got a hit my first season in baseball, but I bet I walked 85% of the time.

 

My first year of live pitch I was terrified of being hit by a ball and don't think I got a single hit that season. My dad worked with me a lot after that season (part of which was hitting me with pitches) and the next year I did pretty well.

 

That's me too, and I still lucked out and got a few hits. Not a ton, but a few.

 

I somewhat agree with this, and I will say it's on a coach by coach basis.

 

Also I think kids don't play pick up games around the neighborhood. The only time they play is at practice and at games. Pick up games with your friends and no one else around is where you can try out a lot of garbage moves and see what works and doesn't work.

I am fortunate in that my son's soccer coach never stresses winning or losing, but skills and passing. If you do that, the wins follow.

 

I bet I had a grand total of about half a dozen official at bats my first season, in 10 or 12 games

 

You don't see it that much anymore. We had some very competitive games of football and wiffleball in people's front yards

 

And then you'll have a kid


I'm joking, kind of.

Both of mine are polar opposites. You can spank the oldest one, he grits his teeth and continues doing what he's doing. Sit him down for 5 minutes and it breaks his spirit. The youngest just turned a year, he'll do something bad and sit down in timeout grinning at you by himself. He's going to be a handful.

 

Get's it

 

One of the great things about being a kid when I was one, was the neighborhood games. We had a huge vacant field across the street with a baseball diamond cut into it complete with back stop. There were enough kids around that we had to take turns playing. We had kids from other neighborhoods bring their teams to play us. All organised by the kids. In the Fall we switched to football. Tackle football!!

 

I hear this in tennis too. But I don't know that I totally buy it. In both instances there are going to be less formal settings where skill can be practiced. So, yes, if you aren't confident kicking with your left foot in soccer or with your volleys in tennis, and you're playing to win, then you're never gonna develop your left and/or volley skills because you'll always be leaning on your strengths when you want to win.

But isn't that what practice is for?

 

Because he didn't swing his bat close enough to the ball.

The guy wasn't coordinated. I think we could have played five season's worth of games and he still wouldn't have gotten a hit.

 

We always had a game of football, basketball or baseball going in my neighborhood

 

Same here. When I was in elementary and middle school, there were a dozen boys within a two year age range living in the neighborhood. We always had games going.

 

Had a kid I grew up with who made an error that cost us a spot in the state Little League tournament. He then proceeded to later hit about .180 for his high school career and sucked every bit as bad defensively. I won't have a conversation with the son of a [itch bay] to this day. The mere thought of how awful he was makes me want to go to his house and punch him in the mouth.

 

Rewarding perfect attendance in school falls in this category. 3rd graders have no say over when they are and aren't going to school. Our school rewards straight-As with a ribbon, and perfect attendance with a free pizza at Pizza Hut. What kinda crap is that?

 

Funding is tied to attendance, so they're just rewarding the money makers