I Hope The DE Bathroom Murder Video Doesn't Get Released

This is incredibly easy to believe. So much so, that I could have done a John Edwards "crossing over" cold read of your middle school experience.

 

This is incredibly easy to believe. So much so, that I could have done a John Edwards "crossing over" cold read of your middle school experience.

 

Ah yes, you are referring to the biggest douche in the universe. I don't actually know much about that guy, but when Trey Parker and Matt Stone devote an entire episode to fully exploring the vastness of his douchebaggery, I take their word for it.

 

The way they broke down cold reading was pretty damn impressive. They had Stan explain exactly bow it works in about 20 seconds.

Stan: Kyle, you can't ruin your life based on what some douchey psychic said. They all just use a technique called "cold reading." They've used it for hundreds of years to make people believe them.
Man 2: [listening, he approaches] Hey, whoa now. John Edward is for real.
Stan: No, he's not.
Woman 2: Yeah. My sister told me he knew our mother's name and when she died. [other adults begin to arrive and give testimony]
Construction Worker: John Edward? Oh yeah, I heard he walked up to a guy on the street, and said his dead father wanted to say "Happy Birthday," and it WAS his birthday.
Woman 3: Yeah kid, how do you explain that?
Stan: [looks around at the adults, then] Alright, look. I'll show you. I just need a volunteer. How about you?
Woman 4: Oh-ho. Me? [steps forward. The others clap]
Stan: Okay, I'm gonna pretend that a dead person is talking to me about you, okay?
Woman 4: Okay.
Stan: Okay, watch, Kyle. Uh, it's an older man, someone very close to you.
Woman 4: My father?
Stan: Does this month, November, hold a special significance?
Woman 4: [gasps] My birthday's in November!
Stan: Right, because he's saying, "Tell her 'Happy Birthday.'"
Woman 4: Oh my God.
Stan: See, Kyle? I just started with something really vague. I chose an older man because I'm betting that, based on this woman's age, her father is most likely dead. But if her father wasn't dead, I could still say it was some other older man.
Man 2: Well then how'd you know her birthday was in November?
Stan: I didn't. I just asked her if November meant anything. Her father could have died in November, or Thanksgiving could have been really special for them. But I go with the birthday and validate it now, as if I knew, by saying "He wishes you a Happy Birthday."
Woman 4: [gasps] What else does he say?
Stan: Okay, I'll just use an old standard. He saying "the money. Stop worrying about the money."
Woman 4: [gasps] Oh my God! My sister and I have been fighting over his inheritance.
Woman 3: That's amazing.
Stan: No it isn't! When a father dies, inheritance is usually an issue, and money is something everyone worries about.
Man 3: That sounds a little too coincidental.
Man 4: Yes. There's only one explanation. This kid can communicate with the dead!
Adults: Wow!
Stan: What?! [his deconstruction didn't work. The adults crowd in]
Man 2: Do me next. I wanna talk to my mother.
Woman 3: Can you try to reach my grandfather.
Stan: No wait.
Construction Worker: You have to tell me if my sister's in a good place. [Kyle walks away from the crowd and into Jewleeard]
Man 5: Yeah, help me out too, 'k?
Man 6: I'm next. I'm next.
Man 7: Hey, get out of my way!
Man 8: Do me!
Scout: Kid, how would you like your own talking to the dead show?

 

This is good too:

[video=youtube;jsWgNOAByFk]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jsWgNOAByFk[/video]

 

The best part of that episode, though, were the Rob Schneider movie previews:


[video=youtube;50leF8g6a5E]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=50leF8g6a5E[/video]

 

Yes, John Edwards and his psychic/medium/televangelist ilk are absolutely human monsters. Was talking about that with someone the other day.

 

So you can be killed by a teenager banging your head on a hard surface?

 

I got into with a guy one time, my dumbass buddy grabbed me to try and stop it but he had my arms pinned to my sides. I got popped 3 or 4 times. I was pissed.

 

Wowowowowwowo

 

Best of luck to the defense attorney on this one. Jesus tittyfocking Christ.

 

All indications are that it's real. But man i's hard to believe.

 

[video=youtube;Nadem-zGOzo]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nadem-zGOzo[/video]

 

She eventually deleted her account. But dear God.

 

Whether you believe the death penalty or not, we can certainly all agree that the world would be a better place that girl was not among the living.

 

If it's beyond on doubt, I have no issue with the death penalty. I'm pretty sure this meets it.

 

This is a bold statement, but I don't know that I've ever heard of a worse human being.