http://m.huffpost.com/us/entry/are-todays-parents-getting-a-raw-deal_b_9645450.html There are some good points and some bad ones. I'm not really interested in turning this into a conversation about millenials, but I am interested in everyone's opinions because a lot of you are raising kids and undoubtedly not doing it the exact same way your parents did. So, flame away.
I joke about getting free labor from my sons. Sometimes, people look at me like I'm horrible because I expect them to weed eat at age 12
By the time I was old enough to mow we'd moved to a house in the woods and didn't have a yard. It was wood splitting at our house.
My grandpa had to quit school in the third grade to start working at a saw mill to help feed the family and I'm having to worry about not raising spoilt dependent kids instead of strong independent ones. I'm glad we're all getting richer and have the luxury of not having to treat out kids as indentured servants.
I am too but like you said about not raising entitled brats, there's a balance. I want my 10 year old daughter to understand that she's not owed anything (from a material standpoint) and that if she wants nice stuff she's gonna have to earn it. I'm not talking about working from "can-see til can't-see" painting the house or chopping cords of wood but I want her to learn how to do household chores with a good attitude. My mother instilled a strong work ethic in me and it's one of the greatest gifts I ever got from her. I want to pass it along.
We're on the same page. I don't want materialistic kids and want them to understand the true value of people and things.
People more so than things.... The older I get the more I realize that the people in my life are my greatest comfort ins joy. Stuff usually disappoints but true friends rarely do. I'm 50 and I have a few friends that I regularly hang with from kindergarten. You cannot buy that no matter HOW much money you have.
Oh if I'm painting the house or digging fence poles they will be doing it too. I already have my 3 year olds taking my weeds to the trash for me.
I would imagine we can all agree there's a proper balance. For example, her whole "my Dad would never come to a ball game because he was busy working and not being a softy" crap was a bit over the top. But it hit home for me because I do think my parents got it right as far as the balance between being loving parents and instilling a work ethic/appreciation for what we had. Both of my parents grew up in homes where their parents were not very active in their lives and I think that's something they never wanted said about them.
Speaking as someone who is in education, also try and get your children off the technology devices as often as possible to create their own entertainment. I see a generation of kids raised on video games, tv and iphones who are, too often, unable to creatively think for themselves, problem solve and have the attention span to contemplate these problems. It's a big reason why I tell my kids to just "go play" as often as I can without the IPad, or whatever, as a passive activity. My 7 year old and 4 year old, as a result, can reorganize their room into a fantasy kingdom in an afternoon or make up some new game, maybe role play for hours, etc., etc. Maybe they're just smart, creative kids and I'm irrelevant in the matter, but I do think this time I have them use without any guidance allows them to be more developed in certain areas than many of my near young adults.
If the most senior generation in the workforce was shocked by the millennials my age and a few years older than me they are going to be terrified by what comes next. Technology dependence is an epidemic.
Yes, people would be astonished at the number of high schoolers who haven't been able to figure out how to calculate their percentage scored on a 25 point quiz. "I have a 20 out of 25, what is that?" "Well, try to figure it out. How would you go about finding the number out of 100?" "Can I use my calculator?" "No." "Ugggh. That's stupid. Can't you just tell me?" "No."
Wait, they don't know how to divide a smaller number by a bigger number, or they don't know that that is what a fraction represents, or they have no clue where a grade comes from?
My kids have pulled weeds since they were six. They push mow now. Both are 13. We have a self propelled mower, but it's still new. The kids aren't allowed to use it. They'll both be gone in six years, and I don't plan on buying another. Both kids do their own laundry, dishes, and clean up poop if a puppy poops in the house (for example). My kids aren't perfect, and they far from welcome work. They do it nonetheless. I try not to be overbearing when they screw up, and it would often be easier and quicker just to do it myself. I believe the wussification of America is directly related to too many kids having everything handed to them. I worry that I'm too easy on mine.
One of my more shining moments as a husband and father is the day 8 years ago that I cancelled our DirecTV account and in effect, killed our television. It's hooked up to a DVD player but nothing else. No antenna, nothing. My daughter plays outside most of the time and invents stuff to do, the way we did when we were young. As a result, she's growing up to be a creative, confident young lady who isn't intimidated by anyone or much of anything. No Xbox or anything like that for her, and honestly, she's never had much interest in gaming anyway. She'd rather read than play some game. We have an iPad and of course the requisite laptop/chrome book. You have to be comfortable using that stuff to function nowadays but she's not dependent on it for entertainment. She'll get her first phone on the day she can pay for it on her own and not before.
